My Strange World

"Kõik on unenäos sügavam, tugevam ja teravam ning tegelikkus on vaid meie mittetegelikkuse kahvatu jäljendus, kus me ärkvel olles ringi liigume, varjates end oma kunstliku Mina taha selles ebakindlas ja sünges kunstlikus maailmas."

"Põhimõttel on kaalu alles siis, kui kõht on täis söödud."

"Kui viibid unenäos, ei ole see unenägu,vaid tõelisus, ja karu hammustus on valus, on tõeliselt valus."

"Kui päike paistab, laenab Pank sulle vihmavarju; ja kui sadama hakkab, küsib selle tagasi."

"An Englishman is a person who does things because they have been done before. An American is a person who does things because they haven't been done before."

"Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint."

"Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society."

"Do something every day that you don't want to do; this is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain."

"Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first."

"Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place."

"I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way."

"I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting."

"I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him."

"If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man."

"In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French; I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their language."

"In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards."

"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt."

"It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it."

"Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great."

"Often it does seem a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat."

"The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco."

"The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug."

"The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself."

"Truth is more of a stranger than fiction."

"When in doubt, tell the truth."

"When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained."

"Of all the animals, man is the only one that is cruel. He is the only one that inflicts pain for the pleasure of doing it."

"Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising."

"A human being has a natural desire to have more of a good thing than he needs."

"There are several good protections against temptations, but the surest is cowardice."

"A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read."

"How little a thing can make us happy when we feel that we have earned it."

"The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot."